don’t tell me my love is too much
just tell me the truth
that my hate is not enough
to have you feeling like
you are nothing
I woke up
seeing you next to me
but, soon after,
reality set in
I wish I could live
in illusion
forever
but life
would be too
worthwhile
don’t look for love
here
it’s hiding
and you’re getting colder
it’s hiding
and i won’t come out
count to ten
count the days and months
the longer you do
the less i’ll count
on you
be careful
of what parts
you take from me
you may
end up wishing
for the ability
to give them back
i have dreams about your lips and i have dreams about my fears
my walls are not Great
my walls are Berlin
my walls are not designed to keep people out
my walls are designed to keep us divided
don’t peek through
just break them down
my walls are a hedge
my love is the maze
don’t break through
just figure me out
there’s not much to figure out
just pay attention and remember your steps
I’ll always remember your steps
let’s break together
let’s build homes with our walls to shelter our hearts
my heart’s been so cold
my heart’s been so weak
just don’t break it
just don’t break it
fond memories are still found without you
i fall in love with customers because they depend on me as much as i depend on them
and for a short time we are on an adventure for something as trivial as soap or a little necklace
and we are in this together
and we are one
and then they leave, maybe after exchanging names
and i see them on the street and we smile
but even then i bore
there are some people who just like to hurt others
they have no reason to do so and get no fulfillment out of it
but they just want everyone to be as scared and sad as them
and they’ll have you believing that you’re not worth anything better
whoever told you that you would be less of a human if you quit something (school, work, a painting, making cookies, dance, or whatever) is a controlling, elitist fuck and you can quit whatever you want because your happiness and well being is more important than anything and you can always try again.
i still think about you every now and then
but i don’t wish that we had what we had again
what is the point of life
are we just chasing dreams that will never come true waiting for emotional fulfillment seeing where it takes us and that’s all?
life has never seemed so tedious to me like it does today
I don’t want to be working toward something that I don’t have a conscious thought of
I don’t want to kill myself at 27 with something or nothing left behind
I don’t want my only reason of living to be that suicide is unattractive to me at that moment
life is just a process
such a process
